Sunday, September 16, 2012

The Un-Candy Coated Happenings....

So, I updated you last week on what an awesome ultrasound we had, along with our wonderful first OB appointment...But I may have been a little vague on current events.  This is due to my idea that having a positive outlook and thought process, every thing will always work out and be okay.  However, I feel dishonest and that is not a feeling that I am fond of.  So with that said, I am going to tell you how I have "really" been and ask that you look at the situation in a positive manner and send nothing but good prayers full of positive love and energy when you are through.

This may be TMI to those with a weak constitution, but it's not too horrible.

The Friday before this past I had a migraine that lasted until after I fell asleep on Saturday night.  I don't know that this has any merit with what happened on Sunday night/Monday morning, but it happened.  On Sunday I felt so much better and cleaned my kitchen (thoroughly).  It was a great day until later that evening when I went to the bathroom and noticed blood (brown old blood) when I wiped.  I immediately laid myself down and decided to take it easy.  I drank a ton of water on top of that.  Later on there was no blood, thank God.

On Monday morning I got dressed and went to work, where upon going to the restroom I noticed more brown blood in my chonies.  At this point, I began to worry a little and called the advice nurse at my OB/GYN office.  The nurse said that she would have the doctor call me back and that they would probably just give me instructions over the phone.  So, I finished a fairly easy day at work and left for home.

After about 10 minutes of being home, I received the phone call from the advice nurse.  They wanted me to come in for a fetal heart beat check.  This was at 12:45 PM.  She said the earliest they could see me was at 1:00 PM.  Thankful that their office is only two exits off of 205 from my house, I said that I would be there.

The nurse that took me back to do the check was really sweet.  At first what I heard was slow and labored and I began to worry.  It wasn't the normal whew, whew, whew that I was used to hearing.  I said something to the nurse and she said that it was the placenta.  That was working, I sighed...But I still couldn't hear the baby.

The nurse kept moving the doppler around and stopping and then looking at her watch.  I asked her if everything was okay and she said that the baby was just moving and she couldn't get the rate.  I guided her to where I had seen the baby "hanging" out in the ultrasound and we were able to very briefly catch the baby's heartbeat, which was very strong.  I guess she/he is a little mover, but thank God once again that we heard that little heartbeat.

The nurse sent me home with a "threatened miscarriage" information sheet with her own notes saying that I should be reassured that we heard the heartbeat.  I was reassured until I received that damn information sheet with such a negative term in bold typing.

I decided that I needed to be positive and prayed a lot to God that the blood would stop and that pregnancy would continue to be viable and the baby would thrive.

There was no bleeding after that, but I did check my cervix and it was very short, soft and slightly open.  I have been on modified bed rest since then...So it's work, then home where I am laying down for the most part.  On Thursday I did another check of my cervix, even though I was apprehensive in doing so because I was afraid of what I would discover, but to my great pleasure and pure gratefulness, it was closed, hard, and longer than it had been earlier in the week.

Friday went without a hitch.  Saturday I went to my 3 year old's gymnastics where I sat in a chair and watched the cuteness before me.  After that I went to my 11 year old's first soccer game of the season where stood and watched an awesome match.  Later that night, last night, I got a horrible, borderline migraine, headache.  I chugged tons of water and laid down at 7:30 PM for an early bedtime.

My headache was gone this morning, thankfully.  I did a cervix check.  It was shorter and softer than on Thursday but not as bad as it was at the beginning of last week.  Back to doing nothing but work and bed rest for me.  I will not take any chances with this pregnancy, but I am assured and faithful that it will all be okay and that I may be over analyzing the feel of my cervix because I am paranoid.

So, my friends, I ask that you help stay positive for me.  Think nothing of good thoughts and how happy and beautiful it will be when this baby's Mommy and Daddy hold her/him for the first time.  It is all going to be okay and I am happy that I can be honest with you, even if opening up took me a little bit of processing.  You are all beautiful and I am grateful to share my story with you.

As always, I love you.

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